Have you ever been held in an interstellar zoo? I only ask because you are staring at me with those wide eyes, pitying my poor soul. Sure, it’s cramped in here and the weather is hot. But what do you expect? We are traveling between the Five Stars to host live shows. We couldn’t possibly be staying in some upscale, state-of-the-art resort, now, could we? It’s a nice life, you might like it. You’re still commiserating me. Stop it. I’m fine, really. What, with all the free food and free lodging in the greatest galaxies in the universe? What more could a man hope for? Ah, yes. I guess I am not so much of a man as I am a Riggotor: part human part Martian. And yes, I see you staring. These are my real eyes. Beautiful aren’t they? You think I couldn’t spy with my seven little eyes that you are ogling these sapphires? Why, they are from my human side, of course. Martians have a boring burnt red color for eyes, but my blessed ancestors from my father’s side have quite the varie...